Painful Puns

I have a 19 year old younger brother. He’s in college away from home studying for his comprehensive exams and he’s a fitness freak.

And so, over last weekend, while he was doing clap push-ups, he slipped and fell on his jaw. He broke it and he even bled through his ear. Went to the hospital and got himself some stitches. Poor kid. He informed me about it, but asked me to not tell our parents because he doesn’t want to worry mom (side note: okay my brother is being very responsible these days, elder sis feels proud). He said he’ll tell her when his semester ends and he has recovered slightly.

So, after he told me and I freaked out a little in the beginning, I thought, hey let’s lighten the mood. It’s time to make bad puns at his cost! Cause if I can’t do that to my brother, who else can I do that to? (Answer is always Drake, my boyfriend… go ahead, pity him. But more on that, later.)

So here are some cringe worthy puns I cracked.

I hear that you had a jaw dropping experience.

I *hear* you.

I hear you had an earily scary experience as well (Read it like eerily).

There are too many puns here. Will make you laugh till your jaws hurt.

Why didn’t you tell mum immediately? Did you fear she’ll give you an earful?

Do you want a necklace? Cause I know you have ear rings now.

Cmon. Are my puns falling flat? Oh crap… are they falling on deaf ears?

I’m sure all of this must be hard to swallow…

You get the drift. All I got in return was “Nerd”. I also made my boyfriend Drake the *butt* of my jokes. Well, he had boils on his bum. So of course I had to make fun of that. He was in a lot of pain, but no gain without pain, am I right?

Is your ass on fire? Because you’ve got boils now.

That’s such a bummer!

You look bummed out.

Like I said, pity Drake.

He gave one back to me though.

Me: I’m so tired, working on this presentation. And my legs are paining for some reason.
Drake: You’re working your ass off. Of course legs will pain.
Me: Haha because my ass is off?
Drake: Yes!

Drake’s adorable.

Now some people might think all of this is insensitive. Some people would rather suffer in pain. Others like me like taking things in a light hearted manner. Puns are awesome! And as they say, laughter is the best medicine!


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