Anxiety Woman

I came up with an alter-ego “Anxiety Woman”, following an episode of major anxiety that had started affecting me physically. Which meant a racing heart, light-headedness, nausea and the inability to sit at one place for too long. Like an OCD hypochondriac, I confirmed all of these symptoms and discovered new ones by Googling incessantly on what anxiety attacks feel like. I think that was supposed to make me feel better somehow.

Meet Anxiety Woman, she has no chill. I think she’s gets a bit out of control most times.

Personally I feel that life should be like an ice-cream. Best served chilled without a melt down. Else it turns into a sticky situation. (I swear I write out puns for my amusement alone).

I was browsing through my old college blog where I sound like an effervescent young, innocent and too-mature-for-her age girl, and I must say that 19 year-old me whoops an almost 24 year old me’s ass, big time. I guess that’s what getting a college degree does to you? Of course, I’ve had a lot of experiences that one only tends to encounter as time passes, but given everything, I really need to start sounding more Agony Aunt-like and less ever-Agonizing Auntie-like. Aunt I making sense?

I’m hoping to keep Anxiety Woman at bay. Her super-powers include:

  1. Drinking ‘large’ to-go coffees that are repeatedly microwaved and heated.
  2. Procrastinating by cooking or watching trashy videos and then compensating the lack of time by not sleeping enough.
  3. Stress eating junk and not drinking enough water.
  4. Having unrealistic expectations from herself in order to become an over-achiever.
  5. Not knowing when to pause and take a time-out.
  6. Being in a perpetual state of stress.

As is evident, she’s not the best at stress-management. In her defense, she really does always have a lot on her plate, pun intended. But she gets damn annoying when she gets cranky and throws a fit.

I think one major difference between “current me” and “past me” is that I just get way too involved with the things immediately around me. I can’t seem to distance and dissociate myself to look at the bigger picture. I often end up feeling lost and confused. And before I can even resolve those thoughts, I find myself in a deeper and deeper abyss. I have stopped observing things around me and I am too pre-occupied with my issues to the point of sounding extremely self-involved. I guess I need to start taking myself a little less seriously and be more sorted, as a person. I think I need to start working at it soon enough. Also, this blog needs a better post frequency. I do always have a lot on my mind and loads to comment on.


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