Spring time

Spring is usually associated with joy and new opportunities and the close of winter. But spring has never really been cheerful for me. So this time, last year and the year before that, were exceptionally difficult for me, for varied reasons. Both times were extremely painful and emotionally scarring. And so some of the associated negative feelings have been resurfacing every now and then for the past few weeks, that I have been trying my best to just ignore and get on with life as usual.

I’m quite determined to break the cycle of spring-related negativity by making this one incredibly awesome. And I guess my efforts haven’t been in vain.

So I decided to lose some weight because of general health concerns. To give you perspective, I weighed a perfectly healthy 135-140 pounds, for a 5ft 7 girl, during college. Then during my final year, i.e. two years back, I was quite sedentary and distressed which led to binge eating patterns and a weight gain to almost 160 pounds. I moved to a new city after that and tried to get my life back on track again, trying a combination of dieting and cycling, which turned out pretty well and I dropped to 145 pounds. Then life spiralled downward, and the huge emotional turmoil led me to gain back all of the weight. After I moved to the US, due to lifestyle and dietary changes, and of course, other stresses, I gained even more weight, leading to an all time high of 164 pounds.

Clearly, there’s a direct connection between my weight and mental well-being. I have developed an increased dependence on food for comfort, which hasn’t worked out in a good way for me. So a month back, I decided to start exercising and eating healthy. This has had its own shares of ups and downs. I can no longer rely on food for happiness, which means that I need to supplement that with work based satisfaction, or exercise or doing something mentally invigorating like reading or writing. But it’s all for the sake of good health and happiness. I’ve actually ended up losing almost 7 pounds since I started going to the gym about a month back!

Work has never kept me busier and I’m hoping to get some promising results out well in time before important deadlines. I don’t think I’ve ever worked to my maximum capacity but ever since I came here, I think I have been, which I guess is something I can be proud of.

I guess all I want to say is that this spring is going to great and I won’t let anything get in the way of that.

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